Doubts before the Start Part 1

Over the past few weeks, I barely had the energy to write anything. Even opening a blank page felt heavy. My mind kept circling the same worries over and over again — whether the WHV in Canada was truly the right path for me, or whether I was about to make a mistake I couldn’t take back.
I knew fear would catch up with me at some point, ever since I handed in my fingerprints last year. But I didn’t expect it to hit me with such force.
For weeks, I was stuck between two choices, constantly switching sides in my head, unable to find peace.

Option 1: The WHV for Canada — something I’ve already poured several thousand euros into. Something I’ve spent a whole year preparing for. Something that has maybe a one-percent chance of being cancelled. And something I know I would regret for the rest of my life if I didn’t do it.

I always imagined it would be a turning point for me, a chance to reshape my life. That hope alone makes the decision heavier. And somewhere along the way, I lost the motivation to take the final steps that would actually get me there.

Option 2: Staying at my current company — a place where things are going really, really well right now, and where this past year has been better than anything I’ve experienced before. A place where people believe in you, where they see your potential, where you feel appreciated and supported. A place where work doesn’t just feel like work, but something you genuinely enjoy.
Real opportunities for growth exist there — something that still feels unusual to me.

There’s even the possibility of taking a sabbatical after several years. I could postpone everything. And even that feels strange, because I’m not the kind of person who usually postpones anything.

“Have you ever experienced that feeling of complete disruption and helplessness when it comes to travel or work?” Write it in the comments!

Part 2 will come on 21.11.